“Why does the end of pregnancy take forever? Is the third trimester longer?”
I can’t tell you the number of times clients, friends and pregnant internet folks who have pondered this with me.
For months, they’ve been focused on their due date. And sometimes it seems like the pregnancy has flown by. One moment they’re peeing on a stick, and confirming the pregnancy test with their doctor. And in the blink of an eye, it’s time for their baby shower.
But as the third trimester comes to a close, time slows to a crawl.
I have a few theories on why this might be happening:
- You’ve run out of parties.
Pregnancy can feel like a series of celebrations. Yay! We know that the baby is real. And then as the first trimester ends, many people feel ready to announce it. Woohoo! As things draw on, maybe there are maternity photos to be taken, and a gender reveal party, and a baby shower at work, a baby shower with family and a co-ed baby shower with friends.
It’s a celebration! Clap clap bravo!
But by the end of that ninth month… no one has planned a party. And you’re just waiting.
- Your to-do list is done.
Most of our clients are busy bees. You’re used to accomplishing lots in your life, and so when you got pregnant, you figured out what needed to be done, and then you did it. The to-do list felt a mile long, between things to keep you healthy, ways to prep for the baby, making sure you had the right provider, the right doula, the right pediatrician, and daycare…
Even the longest to do list gets done though. When the only thing left to do is have a baby, time can start to drag.
- Everything is uncomfortable.
The symptoms of pregnancy sometimes get a little more intense towards the end. You are now carrying a fully formed human, and enough fluid to keep that human softly cushioned. Your body is starting to stretch and open and prepare for birth, and it’s just uncomfortable.
It’s only natural to want to give your beloved child a stern talking to when they’re pushing on your bladder and kicking your ribs.
- You’ve heard all the “jokes” and advice before.
It must get a little boring to repeat yourself to everyone that seems so clever.
Yes, you’re still pregnant. No, you don’t think the baby will stay in there forever. Yes, you’d love to write him an eviction notice. No, it’s not twins.
There are only so many times you can say “Please don’t touch,” with a sweet voice as someone reaches for your belly. And the unsolicited advice about what to eat and do to get things moving must get old by the third trimester.
So, you wait and hope that your baby is coming sooner rather than later.
- You just can’t wait to meet your baby.
This last one is really the heart of the matter. The third trimester can feel long because you are ready to meet this little person. You’ve grown them inside of your for nearly 10 months, and you don’t even know what their face looks like.
You’re anxious, you’re eager, and you’re excited. You want to meet your baby.
Well, take deep breaths. The moment will come.
If I can guarantee nothing else in this line of work (and truly, there’s so little I can promise), I can say this- no one stays pregnant forever. Your baby will come sooner than you think!
Be sure to check out our online pregnancy course designed for women of color, Attain.
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