People often find us because they’re looking for doulas of color, or Black doulas. They are often especially concerned about being pregnant as a Black woman and looking for a labor doula. I’ve been on a soapbox lately though- we need to talk about postpartum and improving the fourth trimester for Black women!
As a country, we’re starting to realize that Black women carry a special burden. We make less money for more work than other people. During every election we’re expected to save the republic. And we have to do it all with a smile, lest we be seen as angry.
We’re also at higher risk for complications during pregnancy birth. But that doesn’t end when the baby gets here, and we need to improve the fourth trimester (the first three months) for Black women, Black babies and Black families.
The fourth trimester is the first three months after a baby is born.
We call it this because the idea is that this early postpartum period is a time when the baby is still adjusting to life out here in the world. And the birthing person is healing, establishing nursing (if that’s something your family chooses to do), and getting to know their new baby, and new role.
When I say that we need to improve the fourth trimester, and focus on postpartum, people often think that I’m talking about a special soup, placenta encapsulation, or some other particular thing that needs to be done.
We can make caring for people during the postpartum period seem very complicated. People think that the fourth trimester has to involve complex ancient rituals, and recipes you’ve never heard of. But we can improve the fourth trimester for Black women by doing something very simple:
Ask a new parent how they’re doing.
Be silent while they respond.
Listen.
Respond to the need.
That’s it. There’s no ritual required.
To be clear: Rituals and traditions have value. I LOVE them. I believe that we should ask our elders how they healed after childbirth- we’d be better off.
But in a world where we’re lacking fourth trimester rituals, the first thing that people need in the postpartum period- especially if they had a high risk pregnancy, a tough birth, or are Black- is to be paid attention to.
Because what many people get is:
- Doctors who are stretched thin
- Family who means well, but impose their own beliefs
- Fear tactics and judgements
What new families need instead is access to simple information for the most likely challenges, good healthcare and support for bigger issues, and encouragement to trust their judgement.
All too often, we get calls from postpartum doula clients who say things like this:
- “Everyone wants pictures of the baby. But no one told me how hard this would be.”
- “When I tried to explain how I’m feeling to my Aunt, she asked how I could be struggling when she raised four kids with less money.”
- “I thought that after my birth complications, I’d be seen more. Is that six week visit really enough?”
And when you add to this the lack of sleep that comes with having a newborn who doesn’t know daytime from nighttime and we have a recipe for being worn down.
Rather than a time to rest and recover, bond with the new baby and get used to this new stage, the fourth trimester and maternity leave often feel like a treadmill that’s moving too fast, and just keeps going.
There is good news though- as a community, we can improve the fourth trimester for Black women.
Barring complications, making things better can be relatively simple.
Three things that improve this time period are things that anyone can do:
- Cook nourishing foods.
When we do this at a postpartum doula shift, we know that it doesn’t have to be a special recipe. Food with protein, some nutritious vegetables, that tastes good and is comforting goes a long way.
- Ensure that new parents get to do basic tasks to take care of themselves, or do the laundry for them!
There are levels to this self-care thing! While yes, ideally you’re treated like royalty after birth, the number of new mothers that don’t get to take a shower by themselves (or do a wash day routine) tells me we need to start with the basics.
- Ask how the new parents are (whether they gave birth or not). Then, don’t dismiss their feelings.
If you say anything to a new parent like “oh just wait until they’re teenagers!”, you’re doing support wrong.
We can do better by new parents. We can make parental leave a time when the new family actually gets to rest and bond, and improve postpartum for Black families.
If you’re reading this while pregnant, we encourage you to start figuring out your support during the postpartum time period NOW. In our course for Black pregnant women, Attain, we talk about building your support system. Check out Attain now.
